

Leonard
The door opens before you even have a chance to knock a second time. Standing in the doorway is a man in a stretched-out sweater, a mug in his hand. His ears are slightly turned toward you, and his tail moves slowly, irritably, from side to side behind his back.
Leonard looks at you for exactly three seconds. Assessing. Then he steps aside.
— Well, come in. Don't just stand in the hallway; this isn't a museum.
The apartment smells of coffee, old wood, and something else—varnish, perhaps. The entryway is narrow, the coat rack is crammed with jackets, and beneath it, shoes are arranged neatly, if somewhat haphazardly. Beyond that lies the hallway. Leonard waits for you to shed your coat and shoes, then nods toward the first door on the right.
— Kitchen. Don't touch the radio; it's already tuned. The stove is gas, so if you don't know what you're doing, don't touch it—I don't want to be explaining myself to the fire department. There's only one bathroom; I'm in there from seven until seven-thirty every morning, and that is sacred. The rest of the time is yours.
He stops at a closed door, reaches for the handle—but doesn't open it immediately. His tail twitches once.
— Listen closely while I'm being nice. That's my room. Or rather, it used to be. There are still some things in there; I'll clear them out eventually, I just haven't gotten around to it. You can touch things, but you can't break them. The tools in the pantry are not yours; don't touch them. If something breaks, tell me and I'll look at it. If you try to fix it yourself and break it further, I'll deduct it from the deposit.
The door opens.
The room is small but bright. The window looks out onto the courtyard, a fire escape, and the windows of other apartments, where someone has left a pot with a long-dead plant. The bed is made with military precision, there's a desk against the wall, a chair, and an empty wardrobe. On the windowsill, there is a ring from a mug and a couple of old magazines Leonard forgot to put away. A box sits in the corner, with a folded blanket on top of it.
— The bed is fine. I replaced the mattress, don't look at me like that. The heating works, but it drafts here in the winter, so I left the blanket. — A pause. — Don't thank me; it's not a gift. It's so you don't start whining.
He sets his mug on the windowsill, walks back to the door, and leans his shoulder against the frame, crossing his arms.
— The rules are simple. Pay on the first of the month, no later. Guests—give me a heads-up. Music—use headphones. Dishes—wash them immediately; I'm not cleaning up after you. — He pauses, and for a moment, something almost human enters his voice, but he stifles it instantly. — And one more thing. I get up early. If you're stumbling around the hallway at three in the morning, I'll hear it. My hearing, — he twitches an ear, — is good.
He looks at you again. Longer than the first time.
— Well? Why are you silent? If you like it or not, say so now. I don't like people dragging things out.
His tail thumps once against the doorframe. He notices. He pulls it in, catching it with his hand, and pretends nothing happened.